Imagine that you’ve been at a dinner party, laughing, talking, and feeling good. Then, you go into the restroom, look in the mirror and see green. A piece of salad stuck in your teeth. Just hanging there for all to see.

You know everybody you talked to saw it. But, nobody said anything.

You can’t see the green stuff that’s stuck in your teeth.

Until you look in a mirror. Or until somebody tells you.

Here’s the thing to know: you do have some kind of green stuff stuck in your teeth, and you can’t see it.

It’s your blind spot.

If you think you know what it is – you’re wrong. The things you know about yourself, your behavior, your impact on others, aren’t blind spots. They’re on your radar. You’re aware of them. Even if you’re not able to change them easily – you know they’re there.

But, blind spots are different.

You can only learn about your blind spot from others.

Their feedback is your mirror. Whether you get feedback in the form of some kind of leadership 360 or in a conversation – it’s a magic mirror that reveals the assessment you are creating in them.

Most leaders assume that feedback is the assessment others are making of them.

But, this is backwards thinking. When other people give you feedback they are showing you the assessment you are creating in them.

You’ll never know unless they tell you.

And they’ll never tell you if you haven’t demonstrated that you welcome, embrace, and cherish feedback. Even feedback that’s hard to hear and that contradicts your self-image. Most people are hesitant to point out your blind spot. They’ll tend to work around your blind spot, compensate for it, and avoid mentioning it unless you ask.

You need to ask more than once.

And then, when you get feedback – take it in. Treat it seriously. Make a public commitment to change. Initiate changes. And check back in – regularly. Make revealing your blind spots a regular part of your leadership agenda.

Unless you understand the assessment you’re creating in others – you’ll spend your career with green stuff stuck in your teeth.

Questions for Reflection & Action:

How do you get feedback from your:

• Customers
• Peers
• Bosses
• Team members
• Family

How satisfied are you with the assessment your creating in your:

• Customers
• Peers
• Bosses
• Team members
• Family

What assessments would you like to change?

Into what?

Related posts:

1. How to End Organizational Chicken Games
2. How leadership stories prevent floods
3. What does a high performance team look like?
4. How to Respond to Criticism
5. How to End Your Organization’s “Chicken” Games